Archive for May, 2011

Ladies & Gentlemen, It’s Mutherfucking Hater Tuesday…

You Know You’re In The Mission When…

• The dude on a fixie who almost just took you out while you WALKED in a CROSS WALK is Mike Giant.

• When you ask a stranger for lunch ideas they recommend more than one place you can get a VEGAN grilled cheese.

• Mustaches. Lots of them. Bad ones.

• Tons and Tons of random homemade flyers advertising things like “Organic Dog Walking” or “Post Metal Folk Rock Band Seeks Drummer and/or Human Synthesist for a Performance Art Piece.”

In case you were wondering, Tara Reid is doing just fine. God damn I love this woman. We WILL be friends one day. I can’t wait to tell her the story about how I popped my front tooth out TWICE in party related accidents.

I blame Rock Band for this.

People always ask me what inspired me to start Hater Tuesday…and I think this image pretty much sums it up.

I text better than you…Actual text from my phone – my thoughts in green, my friend in white…

In other news….

The Roxie SF

For one night only, The Roxie puts away the projector and 9 of San Francisco’s hottest comics take the stage. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll probably be drunk. $6.50 gets you in the door and a bunch of complimentary PBR. Best of all, half of each ticket sale helps The Roxie keep the lights on!

Comics include:
Donny Divanian
Chris Garcia
Emily Heller
Sean Keane
Alex Koll
Cory Loykasek
Lydia Popovich
Chris Thayer
Mimi Vilmenay

Buy Tickets

More Info

Oh there is also THIS to watch, which might just be the greatest video promo for a comedy show ever made. Mustaches, Alf, Wonder Woman? It’s like Trevor Hill climbed into my brain and picked out all my favorite stuff and then made a bad ass video quilt.

Show Them Titties, It’s Mutherfucking Hater Tuesday!

Normally, I don’t endorse graffiti or graphic sexist come-ons but it’s pretty hard to deny the beauty of the combination. Photo by everyone’s favorite, the mayor of Awesometown, Diane Lee.

For Real! This image was captured by a hater at large. It was submitted by my coworker. Evidently a female family member of his saw this shit in the wild at her hair salon. She was just out trying to get some overpriced hair products when BAM – MAN ASS IN THONG – appeared in front of her. At first it was just a glimmer of man thong. Then BAM – FULL ON ASS OUT IN THONG!

Please note this was NOT taken in SF, it was out in the ‘burbs somewhere. That makes it even more special. I really, really appreciate the clarity of these images and the dedication of the hater on the scene.

Lost Notes to Self -

12.04.10 5:43 pm

I’m not drunk enough yet

9.30.10  7:37 pm

Favorite thing about waiting for the 71 on Haight & Divisadero? Watching fat hipsters huff and puff uphill on a fixie. Betcha wish you had gears now, huh fattie?

2.10.11 12:41 am

Overheard at Zam Zam – “I would be a lot happier if my girlfriend had brown hair and brown eyes and read more books. I’ve only seen her with like 3 books over the last two years….and I’m not even sure she ACTUALLY read them”

4.12.11 8:32 am

Ever notice that old white people’s mouths pucker and wrinkle like crazy? That wrinkled pucker in combination with eminent death brewing from the inside out makes them smell and look like It’s like their mouths have turned into face assholes.

3.18.11 2:25 pm

Overheard at The Grind – a total bro “studying” for the GRE breaking the ice with a super hot out of his league neurosurgeon

“You rage hard don’t you….you should come to my bar later.”

Neurosurgeon to bro -

“Um, not really. I’m a resident neurosurgeon at USF so I work long shifts. When I’m off I like to sleep and try to have fun but I don’t exactly…Rage”

I’m performing in the FINAL round of the Rooster T Feather’s Comedy Competition tomorrow night WEDS MAY 4 at 8PM in Sunnyvale. I REALLY want to win so come out see the show and cast a vote for me. It’s audience vote just like American Idol – LET ME BE YOUR IDOL!